LucyUnfortunately the moment you start to dress or act differently you seem to make some peoples brain engage in a very strange way. Instead of being their usual selves they decide that as they do not understand what’s going on, or why – that there best reaction is to hurl abuse – shout or try and intimidate.
I have had my fair share of this, and I still do sometimes depending where I go. In this country of the Great Britain that I live in, you should never have to feel like you cannot go somewhere in fear of others or what might happen. I know this has been going on for years, and women in particular feel threatened or in danger. At this point of my life early 2022, I was not sure what I was. I was not a man in the traditional sense, and I was not a woman, I was a crossdresser but the term sat uncomfortable with me. A crossdresser is some one who wears the other genders clothes. I believe that’s the definition. I do – but I do not revert back to Male clothes. In fact in 2022 I was now at the point of not owning hardly any male clothes at all, so spent my time dressed in women’s clothes. As Eddie Izzard said “there not womens clothes there my clothes” – Sorry I am coming away from the post content, but I think it helps for context.
I have had abuse in various ways like..
“Fxck off out of our town you queer fxggot” – two things in that statement I am not
“Fxcking bender” – again I am not
“What the fxck do you look like?” – usually said by someone looking worse than me in male mode if I hadn’t bathed or shaved for a week.
The out of town comment was from a group of young men in a local town – it made me feel very upset, I did report this to the police -but the police comment was – unless you have them recorded it’s there word against yours, so now If I am ever in that area in an evening – I phone my wife or I record my walk. It’s better to be safe!
The thing I have learnt over time, is to pick my battles carefully. If I am in full on anger mode, I will shout back, tell them to shut up or fxck off – but this is not always the best idea 😉
My wife if she hears anything goes mental – its great when your wing woman cares so passionately about what you are doing that she will help protect you. If that statement makes me sound like a wimp, then I am not. I used to get bullied at school, and soon learnt that their was always safety in numbers.
My confidence during 2023 has grown, and I try not to let anything bother me and I don’t take any shit any more. There are multiple people in my life that have helped with this mindset, maybe you will learn about them later – but for now I have decided to own who I am.
Hugs
Lucy x